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For so much of my life, I was terrified of going and doing things by myself. I would never have dreamed that I could go to dinner or to see a movie on my own. Going solo seemed like a bad idea. But in the past several years, my viewpoint has changed significantly.
There’s something undeniably liberating about grabbing your own hand (figuratively, of course) and saying, “Let’s go!”, without waiting for someone else to join you. In a world where we’re constantly told that experiences are meant to be shared, the idea of intentionally going out alone can feel a little rebellious. But here’s the secret: doing things by yourself isn’t just freeing. I’ve found that it’s also deeply empowering.
Rediscovering yourself through solo adventures
One thing that was always a struggle when going out with others was having to plan around the schedules, preferences, or moods of others.
When you take yourself out, you’re not catering to anyone else’s schedule, preferences, or moods. It’s just you, doing exactly what you want to do. That might mean savoring a long lunch at a café without having to rush, exploring a museum at your own pace, or sitting in a park with a good book. These solo moments strip away the noise of other people’s opinions and give you the rare chance to listen to your own desires.
Building confidence, one outing at a time
The first time you go out alone, it might feel awkward…even intimidating. But the more you do it, the more confident you become. Navigating the world on your own terms sends a powerful message to yourself: I am capable. I am enough. That quiet confidence starts to seep into other areas of your life, from your work to your relationships.
I started by going to a local state park and hiking by myself. It got to the point that I loved that time in nature by myself so much that when others offered to join me, I turned them down. It turns out I actually liked that time with me!
Falling in love with your own company
Spending time with yourself helps you see your own quirks, preferences, and rhythms in a new light. You start to enjoy your own humor, notice how good it feels to follow your own pace. And you may even find that your “alone time” becomes the highlight of your week. The more you cherish your own company, the less you’ll settle for situations or relationships that drain you.
A practice in mindfulness
Solo outings naturally invite mindfulness. Without the distraction of conversation or someone else’s agenda, you become more aware of your surroundings, the taste of your coffee, the colors in the sunset, the way a stranger’s laughter floats through the air. These details, so often missed, become little treasures.
Final thoughts
Taking yourself out isn’t about shutting other people out. It’s about strengthening your relationship with yourself so that when you are with others, you show up more fully, more authentically, and more joyfully. Your life is happening now, and you don’t need to wait for someone else to join you to start living it.
So go ahead, book the ticket, reserve the table, wander into that gallery. You might be surprised at how much you love your own company.
