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Kathy Seppamaki

Kathy Seppamaki

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Learning to Just Be Yourself blog post title with picture of a colorful painted woman

Learning To Just Be Yourself

kathyseppamakiMay 26, 2019November 18, 2023
It’s easy to say “just be yourself” to someone. But many don’t realize that they are disconnected from who they are. Society likes people who conform, and so from an early age, we often are told that if we are different in any way it is “bad”. This is particularly true if you are an empath and have psychic abilities, which aren’t as easily acceptable in society. Parents, teachers, peers, siblings, friends, spouses, colleagues…all give feedback on who we are every day. And they often hold their own opinions about what they think you should do, how they feel you should act, and who they feel you should be. Because of this, there is often pressure to conform to what others want of us so that we can gain their approval. But this comes at a high cost. We can wind up giving up parts of who we truly are, just to make others happy.

Stress

The other cost is the stress and tension that is created by not aligning with who you truly are. For many people, this type of chronic stress can go on for years, or even decades. And it can contribute to a long list of health issues such as digestive problems, depression, anxiety, headaches, weight problems, insomnia, and more. I certainly have been guilty of this in the past. But as I moved away from needing the approval of others, and back to being the fullness of who I am, I began to understand that in trying to make others happy, I was denying parts of myself that not only do I need…but the world needs as well. Many people are guilty of this as well. If you believe you’ve done this as well, it’s never too late to reconnect with who you are. The world needs you…the fullness of you. And that means showing them the flawed, unique, quirky, brilliance of who you are. Don’t hide that away from the world any longer!

How to start reconnecting with your authentic self

Start paying attention to how you are feeling

I’m amazed by how often I used to ignore how I was feeling about things in my life. It is so easy to get into the pattern of disregarding how you feel or even stuffing down emotions that aren’t so comfortable. Just spending a few moments sitting and recognizing how you are feeling without judgment is a very valuable way to begin reconnecting with yourself!

Check out what you are thinking

What kinds of thoughts are you thinking about yourself? If you are constantly putting yourself down and being critical of different aspects of yourself, then it may be time to make some changes. How does it feel when you are negative towards yourself? I would guess it doesn’t make you feel great. But what if you switched to thoughts that empowered and uplifted you? That would be SO much better!

Make “you” time a priority!

In this busy modern world, it has become so common for most women to forego self-care regularly. For some reason, we’ve come to believe that taking care of our basic needs is selfish. That type of thinking needs to be changed…and fast! Without taking time out to nurture your body, mind, and spirit, your energetic well WILL run dry. When that happens, you will get sick, maybe even chronically. You will have nothing left to give to those who need you. When you regularly take time to take care of yourself, you will discover that you have so much more energy to complete the things you need to complete and take care of the people you need to take care of!

Listen to your body

Our bodies speak to us all the time! But we’ve become so overloaded by external stimulation that we’ve begun to tune out the messages we are being sent. How long has it been since you truly felt hunger or thirst? What about aches and pains that you ignore? Take some moments throughout your day to check in with your body and give attention to how it’s feeling. Do a quick body scan and pay attention to each part of your body. Check for little aches and pains and listen to how your body is speaking to you. These are just a few ways you can begin to reconnect with who you really are! As you learn to be yourself, you will begin to discover things about yourself that you didn’t know. It’s a fascinating but wonderful process, so enjoy learning more about yourself and your body.

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Wishing everyone in the US a very Happy Thanksgiving!!! I hope your day is filled with food, family, and fun! Have you every forgiven yourself? Or do you continue to mentally chastise yourself and put yourself down for the things you’ve done and who you are? It’s time to forgive yourself and to learn to love yourself again. Look online this time of year and you will see lots of memes that make fun of those who decorate for Christmas early. But the truth is, I always have. It makes me happy. The holiday season is such a magical time. And my little magical heart loves to savor every magical moment of the season. I just can’t wait to get my decorations up early each November. And I don’t care what others think about it! Kindness is a powerful force that can transform the world. Kindness has the power to uplift spirits, mend broken hearts, and create a ripple effect of positivity. It is a light in the darkest of times. The world needs kindness now more than ever. So be kind always! Have you gotten stuck in a pattern of waiting? Life can pass you by and before you know it years have flown by and you’re still there...waiting. You have the power to break free from that pattern. To pursue a life far bigger than you ever dreamed possible. It all starts within you. Say this outloud, and then say it again. It’s time to choose you. Stop people pleasing and be true to who you really are. Your authentic self is calling, and that call will only get stronger until you listen. One of the thoughts that people struggle with the most is that they are not good enough or not worthy. But that isn’t true. You are here and your very presence here on Earth means that you ARE good enough and that you ARE worthy. You wouldn’t have been created if you weren’t. You are needed just the way you are. I cannot begin to tell you how many women I talk to every day who struggle with body image and self-love. The sad thing is that negative body image and a lack of self-love are things that we’ve been conditioned to believe. We had to be taught to hate ourselves. And the marketers and society have done a great job in making us feel as if we aren’t enough if we aren’t the right size or if we somehow fall outside of the impossible beauty standards that are in place today. And most people don’t even question how unhealthy and impossible those standards are. And fewer see how truly beautiful women really are. I made this video after a conversation with a beautiful, thin friend who sat and berated her body for over 30 minutes. I’ll admit that I used to do the same thing. But I learned to love and appreciate my body, no matter what size I am. Does that mean I don’t want to make some changes? I do, for health reasons. But no matter what I love my body and what it does for me every single day. We’ve been fed the narrative that we should aspire to be like fairy tale princesses. We all know their stories. But honestly, the most powerful character in the fairy tales are the Fairy Godmothers. They are the ones who make the magic happen. Magic is real. And we all have magic within us. We have the magic to create a like that we have only dreamt of before. We are truly powerful. So instead of wanting to be like the princess, we should all want to be like the Fairy Godmother. Then we can have it all!
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